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According to Hinduism there are sixteen religious rites to be performed by
every Hindu. These are called sanskaras. Vivah (marriage) is one of these
Sanskaras according to Lord Manu. Vivah is a union with consent between a
man and a woman for life and is religiously solemnized. It is the ceremony
prior to the entry into the householder’s life, the second of four
stages in the life of a Hindu.
The Institution
Vivah is a union which binds not only two hearts together but two
families as well, and in Hinduism this union is especially sacred. For the
strength to love, to obey, to discriminate and to understand, humble
supplications are made by the dulhan (Bride) and the dulha(Bridegroom) at
the time of the Vivah. A married couple living according to the dictates
of Dharma, pooling their mental and physical resources together for the
success of the marriage union, can achieve nothing but complete marital
bliss.
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Var Paksh Swagat
Milani
(Welcoming the Wedding
Party)
On the wedding day, at an auspicious hour, the dulha, bedecked in
resplendent ornamental costumes, with a crown on the head and yellow or
pink gown, arrives with his family and friends at the dulhan’s
residence where the ceremony takes place. This is his Baraat.
Dvar Puja
At the entrance to the dulhan’s residence, the fathers of both
dulhan and dulha embrace each other. The dulha is garlanded. Vedic hymns
are chanted by the priest in attendance. A short puja or prayer service
takes place. The dulha accepts a gift from the dulhan’s
father.
Parchan
The dulha enters the premises where the mother of the dulhan and her
female friends welcome him. They honor him with Aarti, give him gifts
and extol his virtues in their songs. Some of them may be seeing him for
the first time and for this reason Parchan, which means an examination,
is done. They see his face and his physical features.
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Janwaas
After the Parchan ceremony is over, the dulha and his baraat retire to a
place of rest provided by the dulhan’s father. Jan means
people and Waas means to rest. They tarry for a while and obtain
some rest prior to the elaborate ceremony to follow. The dulhan will
soon leave her childhood companions and the comfort of her parent’s
home to seek a new life and new friends. The sadness of parting is
noticeable and is also a reminder to the dulhan’s mother to be
prepared to endure her daughter’s parting with fortitude.
Bride
Enters Mandap
Pooja to Lord Ganesh is performed,
followed by Raksha Sutra
Raksha Sutra
is a cord of protection. In this part of the ceremony the barka(dulha’s elder brother) enters the Mandap and after a short ritual he places a cord of protection around the neck of the dulhan. In placing this cord on the dulhan’s neck the dulha’s brother takes a vow to protect the dulhan in all distress and adversities which may befall her.
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Bridegroom Enters Mandap
He is welcomed by Bride’s Father
The Vivah preparation now begins and proceeds in the following stages. The dulha enters the Mandap for the first time. Madhuparka is a sweet liquid combination of ghee, dhai and honey. Under the bedecked atmosphere, the dulha’s hand is held by the dulhan’s father and his request is that the relationship between the two parties remain as "sweet" as the liquid combination ghee, dhai and honey, which are the ingredients of Hindu hospitality. At the same time a loin cloth is presented to the dulhan on which he sits.
Kanyadaan
Kanya means a maiden dulhan and Daan means to give. The sacrificial fire is kindled by the dulhan’s priest and then the rest of the ceremony takes place. The
dulhan, now adorned in a richly colored sari, enters the Mandap . In a touching ceremony the dulhan hands are placed in the dulha’s while water is being poured in a continuous flow by the
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dulhan’s brother The priest reads the sacred vow which the dulhan’s
father takes in giving his daughter away. Now, in all solemnity she is
handed to the man whom she loves and will obey henceforth. The
dulhan’s father now vows by the sun, stars, the deities and by man to
give his daughter away to the dulha.
Panigrahan
Pani means the hand. Granhan means to grasp. The dulha now
formally grasps the hand of the dulhan and leads her gently to his side
where she sits beside him on his right.
Bhawar
Bhawar means circle. After the dulhan seats herself on his right,
the fire ritual commences. The priest chants vedic hymns. Offerings are
made to the fire. The dulhan leads first with the dulha behind her.
Thereafter the dulha leads with the dulhan following. Together they go
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around the sacred fire seven times, four by the dulhan and three by the dulha, throwing grains each time into the fire known as lawa . Their garments are knotted together as they go around the fire. The significance of throwing grains is that they both will join together in performing the Yajnas, sacrifices and religious rites which a Hindu household is required to perform throughout their married life. Moreover the dulhan, by leading first, is demonstrating her determination to stand first beside her husband in all their happiness and sorrows during their married life.
Sapta Padi
(Taking seven steps together)
The couple then walks seven steps together reciting mantras which express their principal duties as
householders:
1. Let us take the first step to provide our
household with a nourishing diet.
2. Let us take the second step to develop
physical, mental, and spiritual powers.
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3. Let us take the third step to acquire
and increase our wealth by righteous
means and proper use.
4. Let us take the fourth step to
acquire knowledge, happiness and
harmony by mutual love and trust.
5. Let us take the fifth step so that we
are blessed with strong, virtuous
and heroic children.
6. Let us take the sixth step for self
restraint and longevity.
7. Let us take the seventh step to be
true and faithful companions and
remain lifelong partners by this
wedlock.
Shila Rohan
Shila means a rock and Rohan means to thread on. After throwing the lawa, the dulhan now places the toe of her right foot on a small piece of solid rock. She thus shows that her devotion towards the dulha will not be hollow, but solid as the piece of rock on which she places her toe. The dulha accepts her promise and removes the rock with his right hand.
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Saat Vachan
The dulhan, still seated on the right of the dulha, now makes seven request which he is required to give consent to. She then goes over to his left where she seats herself and thus becomes his wife. From request number one thru six, the dulhan seeks to be consulted on all important issues relating to their successful matrimonial life. The final request is that they should be devoted to each other and nothing should come between them. The dulha answers in the affirmative, and he himself makes one request of the dulhan, that in accordance with Dharma, she shall be devoted to him in mind and body. She answers in the
affirmative.

Touching of the Heart
The bridegroom then comes over bride’s right shoulder touches her heart saying:"I hold your heart in serving fellowship, your mind follows my mind. In my word you rejoice
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with all your heart. You are joined to me by theLord of all creatures."
Sindoor
Sindoor is vermilion powder. The above pledges having been made, the dulha now applies sindoor on the forehead of his
dulhan. He puts a red dot on her forehead and places the powder in the parting of her hair. This is the traditional mark of the Hindu married woman whose husband is alive. The dulha requests that she keeps this mark on her head signifying her marriage to him. The dulha says "I bedecked thee Oh bride with this mark of mine. Keep it as long as I live. May you always be happy and have long life."
Aashirvaad
Aashirvaad means blessings Once the wedding rituals have been completed, the couple touches the feet of their parents and
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the priest, asking for their Aashirbaad.
All those assembled shower flowers on the couple and bless them on their marriage.
The dulha and his baraat now proceed to have khichari together in the Mandap.
Vidai
The ceremony is completed with the departure of the Dulha and Dulhan, which is know as Vidai. Farewell to the dulhan by her parents, siblings, relatives and friends is indeed a very emotional part of the whole event. The dulhan leaving her parental home to build an entirely new life with her husband and members of his immediate family in a different environment altogether. She leaves with tears of joy and sorrow, but carries the very best wishes of all who witnessed her
Vivah Sanskar.
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